Change?

I've just learnt that my mate *rima rim ^_^* Is coming over from north africa (algeria) to visit London! :D
I'm so amazingly happy! seriously were going to rock London while shes here iA!

Ok...So I finaly got down to some course work...and Its going well masha'allah....I've been doing esseys mostly, because thats what I need to work on most realy...and I need to brush up on biology iA.
I'm going to a pizza party at my mates later on (I'm not sure what a pizza party is exactly...but yeah)...so that'll be cool (hopefully).

So were going to algeria in june iA (family) and this time were "going for good" (apart maybe from the odd holiday?).
I can;t say I'm looking forward to it...because I'd be lying, I am however willing to stick it out.
I think the first time we went we wern't quite sure what to expect...and thats why things turned out awfully bad *VERY bad*...this time I have more of an idea of what to expect...family and all that. So it might be better.
The problem isn't the country....Its the family...My dads cool masha'allah but his family isn't all that you know...they were pretty *un-welcoming* when we went the first time bar a couple of his brothers. I suppose that put me off *alot*. But like I said I'm willing to stick it out for the family...There are loads more people there now (my age)...and so long as I have some freedom then it should be ok.

I suppose I'm not one of those people that like change...I was braught up here in London...and unfortunatly I've become part of this country (no matter how much dispise it...Its my home) I think I'll probably always regard this country as part of me...I may not be welcomed here (obviously) but this being the place that I grew up in...Its the only place that can be regarded as home (if you get me).

Now realy...I'd like to satay here finish my GCSE's etc and then maybe go...but we have to go now or the opertunity will pass and we'll be stuck here another year. This country is becoming more un welcoming as the days go by...you get spat at in the street...people treat you like dirt etc...where as there...even though its not a Islamic country...Its majority Muslim so at least your welcome there (a little anyway).

I don't know...I'm kinda confused you know.

Is change always such a bad thing?

New sketch book...o_0

.:APPLE:.

(crying apple...^_^)

gIfTs: from rima rim ^_^

(a pretty lil jewelary box)
(top of the box)

(some bootiful beads...aint they just cute ^_^...hey I'm making some earings with them :D)

.::Don't let go...::.

Hola....

I spent eid at home...The sloth like aproaches to eid anoy me, and people reluctence to do anything anoys me even more.
So eid as per usual was spent at home...

Yesterday we wen't out for a late eid dinner at a turkish resteraunt...I also wen't out for late eid shopping...because we had late eid guests.
The resteraunt was cool mA...I had a great laugh and endless amusment with my mate ami (who kept shovelling food into my gob...and dropped my new arm socks in a liver and kidney dish...Not only did they stink...but I had to wear them in that foul condition for fear of making my pockets stink equaly as bad). Late eid shopping was a succes...and everyone was happy with their giffts mA...which were mostly earings etc...(some people are yet to receave their presents...don't mock...late gifts isn't a tragedy).
I got ami a pair of BIG silver hoops with words ROCK in the middle (they were damn cool), and I got my other mate a freindsgip bracelet (cute).

I haven't been studying (I'm not a succesful learner left to my own devices), but I wil start iA (soon) *cough*...no REALY I will.
Nobody apreciates my shoes...I asked if I was missing somthing and was received by blank stares (well fine be like that then)...

Quite frankly I have no idea what I'm rambling about...I've spent the past two weeks watching telly and being a slump (and I'll admit it) a lazy gitt. There is nothing to report on because nothing has been done. And there is nothing to contemplate on eather...because my mind is full of such trash no thought of any use has enterd it for a while.

Yesterday I watched a film "the motercycle diare's" about Che guevara as a youth...It was fantastic...apart frommthe odd bits.

I wonder what its like to be loved by people you don't know?

*UGLY*

(I'm disgusted...Its so out of perspective I feel like screaming...and I did)

tOpS: prezzies for eid...teehee

Letter: from a fwend

Don't look down....

(Made with eyeliner...who say's I can't be inventive?)

HEALING HEART

(made last night...Its a healing heart....Previously broken...on the road to recovery)

Not so busy (but still busy)

The question arises...how can you not be busy but STILL be busy?

i.e, your not continuesly busy..have loads of things to do...BUT ordinary life takes over...and you find yourself wasting time and using it up carelesly.

I happen to not be busy but still be busy...busy in the metaphorocal sense rather then the actual thing (because we like to make things complecated...obviously)

So, I've been attempting to draw...and succesfuly compleated one shoe...and for a first attempt Its not all that bad...could of been better I won't deny it...But not bad.
My next drawing is set to be a pair of glasses with a bullet smashing through one of the lenses...the Question may arise..."whats the point" the answer will arise..."I don't know"...It took my fancy all of a sudden, and being me I arose to the chalange...

Tired...

(My first attempt at a shoe...stayed up till one o.clock in the morning drawing it...and now am suffereing the consequences....I look awful...But hey the shoe doesn't! )

^-^ emo? (everyones emotional)

nOtHiNg...

Have you ever had one of those days where you realy don't feel like doing anything?

I mean...nothing AT ALL.

I'm having one of those days...and despite my nay attempts to banish it...Its just not happening (I would say its a shame...but when I think about it logicly...its not that bad...). Now realy...I should be attempting to compleate (or should I say "start") My maths course work...But I've got all the time in world right.....? (try 24 hours)
I should also be attempting to tidy the *rag house* (wardrobe?)...But no daubt if I leave it alone...It'll gain a life of its own and pick its self up out of the dumps and get back into order. My brain may also gain a life and common sense will tell it that NO clothes don't walk and tidy themselves...but hope gets the better of me...So I'll dream on.
Its just hit me that I'm lagging behind terribly in my course work...I have to read a ton of books (not realy that much of a problem...IF they intrested me in the slightest that is) And I also have to catch up on esseys...(oh joy).
Now in my opinion theres nothing remotly wrong in lagging behind...So long as your moving up slowly...I however seem to have come to a halt...Or maybe I'm tricking myself?
I've been spending an awful amount of time online lately...(slow transformation into a nerd?)...and I don't think its doing me much good (does it ever?)...I get myself involved in waaay to many arguments...(and NO I don't start them...I just make sure I finish them).

I've recently started listening to music (Don't get the wrong picture...only outlandish...but then thats bad enough as it is)...And I'm feeling extreamly down in the dumps...(because I know its wrong). Its one of those things that I know is wrong...but find hard to correct.
And correcting mistakes isn't easy in the first place...

I've been secretly hoarding things for my mate...(theres nothihng wrong with them)...Only her family tend to be stricter then others (VERY strict). I felt slightly deveous at first...and slightly *wrong*. But have come to the conclusion *using my wacked up logic* that theres nothing wrong with it...So I've decided to quit feeling bad...and *chin up*.

I've got classes tomorrow...And I'll have to face a "freind" again. Does it anoy when you have to mingle with people you dispise?

Its one of those senarios where you feel obliged to mix with someone for the sake of manners and erm...because you know that if you don't...other troubles may arise. This becomes even more anoying when its a family freind...her fathers freinds with mine...her mothers freinds with mine...brothers freinds with mine...and the list goes on.

I'm wearing electric blue eye liner (cat eyes)...looks ok actualy...